A Soulful Spring Break

This past week has been a week of reenergizing and rest. We all need that every now and then, don't we? It flew by, but each day went by slowly, so I was able to enjoy it whole heartedly. I would usually do a huge photo dump on a post like this, but I actually don't have a ton of pictures from this break. It was one of those weeks where life was just enjoyed, although it was not captured. Here's what filled my restful week...

Several episodes of The Office

  A few movies at home with mom

Laughs with my best friends

      An afternoon of bowling, dinner, and movie going with my cousins

 Shopping at the outlets

    A bone marrow drive

Two birthday parties

  A spring day at the park

A trip to Trader Joe's

      Applying for housing and scholarships

Now it's time for the grand finale of high school. I really can't believe it's almost over. These past four years have flown by, each filled with challenges and joy. As the future comes quickly, I'm just embracing it and savoring each last moment I have left. April will be a busy month jam packed with lots of lasts but lots of fun.

On deck, we have...

A choir ski trip and festival!

PROM

Senior boards

Tennis matches

Senior banquet

The end is near and it's bittersweet.

crawling to the finish line, I mean graduation;)

xo

Hannah

Fresh and Clean

I have a love/hate relationship with the spring. It's such a tease. One day, the weather is balmy and 65, and the next, it's snowing sideways. It's also the time of year that goes by the fastest. Soon, I'll be rereading this post and it will summer, and I'll be a high school graduate, basking away in the summer heat. But for now, life is full speed ahead. Senior boards are coming up, along with prom, a choir ski trip, AP exams, and lots of lasts. I'm reveling in all these final high school moments, but am excited for what the future holds.

Today, the birds are chirping and sun is out, and the earth is blooming. So it only felt right to give my blog a spring welcome. I sure can't wait for those summer days, where the birds never stop chirping.

via

xo
Hannah

PS- I apologize for my lack of posts, I have a concussion and am avoiding screen time so I can get better faster. Typing/reading/bright screens just make my headache and nausea worse, so I've just been lounging around lately. As soon as I'm feeling better, I have lots to catch up on!

I'm Going to Be A Buff!

Sometime towards the beginning of junior year, I came up with a perfect photoshoot idea for when I finally chose where I was going to college. I saved nearly every piece of college mail I ever received in boxes and bags in my room and I was finally able to put it to use in this photoshoot!

It's corny and cheesy but I love it :)

too many choices!

narrowed it down (ps I also got into University of Washington but my letter had not come yet:/)

decision made 

and because my parents went to csu;) and so is sierra! it will be fun to be rivals! 

and in the midst of all my mail, I found this note from Mackenzie from freshman year. Almost made me cry

Now I have 50lbs (I'm not even exaggerating right now) of college mail in a black trash bag. I'm not sure what I'll do with it, but I feel SO happy to have finally decided!

xo
Hannah

Applied, Accepted, Confirmed

I've never been good at making decisions, literally from the day I was born. I got stuck, and the doctors said that it was because I had started to come out and down, but then turned myself around to go back in and up. Senior year, however, has forced me to make a lot of decisions.

I remember my junior year. I watched as the seniors applied to college, got accepted, and made their decisions where to go. It was hard for me to comprehend that that would soon be me. I was still so caught up in high school that the future seemed far off. And then came the summer. I began making lists of where I wanted to go. It was so difficult to choose because everywhere had a little appeal to me. But eventually, I narrowed it down. Then came the application process, which I thought was the most awful thing in the world (little did I know how sucky scholarship applications would be). Once everything was in came the wait for responses. I'll never forget my first response (and acceptance!) - University of Oregon. Others trickled in over the course of two months. I thought I knew what I wanted but I really didn't. Time helped the decision process, along with a lot of talking and thinking and just believing that I would end up in the right place.

I eventually had it narrowed down to about three or four schools. When it came down to it, here's what my deciding factors were:

1. In state- At the start of this big college adventure, I didn't really care if I went out of state or I stayed in. I thought I wanted to go out for a while- I was craving some new adventure. Then I realized, wherever I went, a new journey would await. I'm also very close with my family and it would definitely be difficult to be very far. Four years is not very long, but at the same time it is. These next four years of my life are ones that could bring a lot of change, so it's nice to know my family will be right there. I know that I have so many years ahead of me to go out when I am more ready. Plus, medical school is possibly in my future, so I can go out then! Wherever I go, it will be something new and fun and different!

2. Had my major- Once I chose my major last summer, I fell in love and there was no going back. The problem, I also loved DU... but DU did not have it. I met with an admissions counselor to look at majoring in biology, and compared it to physiology courses. However, it just wasn't the same. Physiology was exactly what I wanted, and I felt like my major was something I just did not want to bend on.

3. Was it right for me?- I really hate following a pack and doing what everyone else does, just because everyone else does it. This probably caused me the most stress. I didn't want people to assume that I was just going to a school that was easy to get into, and that every other kid in Colorado went to. But I had to push away all those thoughts and do was right for me. These next four years of education were all about me, and what was best for my future.

I had made up my mind at the end of February, but I had to let it seep inside of me. A few months ago, I came up with an idea on how I was going to tell my parents and worked to make it perfect. I am so in love with how it turned out, and how much my parents loved it. Such a burden was lifted off my shoulders once I finally decided. There was lots of happy tears shed and I am overall so happy with my decision! College, I'm coming for you!

"Just know, that wherever you go, you can always come back home..."

xo
Hannah

1, 5, 10, 20

1, 5, 10, or 20 years, future Hannah, please remember to always let your awkwardness shine

I should probably be doing this post closer to the end of the school year, but I think I'm just going to be a hot mess of emotions then so why not do it now? It seems like since we were in 6th grade, at one point or another, we have to fill out a little worksheet of some sort that asks, "Where do you see yourself in a year from now? Five years? Ten years? Twenty years?"

One of my favorite bloggers ever, Bonnie, did a little post based on this infamous question. I loved that she was able to do a comparison of what she thought, and how it actually panned out. So one day I hope I can reference this post and do something similar :)

ONE YEAR

In one year, I'll be close to finishing my first year of college! (Oh and in case you were wondering, I finally decided where I will be off to next fall, but all you suckers are going to have to wait because that is going to get one heck of a special post!) I hope that I really love school but something deep down inside of me tells me that it's going to be the next best chapter I could have ever pictured. I will have made new friends, but will stay in touch my best friends through various ways. I really really really hope by then I will have had some actual interaction with boys because this girl can't be the president of the VLC forever.

FIVE YEARS

In five years, I will have finished undergrad! I hope to have studied abroad, somewhere in Europe specifcally. Maybe the Cork Islands or London or Glasgow!! I will be a first year medical student, where, I do not know. I will know that medicine, however, is my calling. There is no greater satisfaction than helping someone. I figure I will have had a boyfriend or two and have gotten to be as much of a relationship expert as a 23-year old can be. I will have my own little house or apartment- something small but quaint. Maybe I'll have a roommate that I can watch The Office and Grey's Anatomy with, or maybe I'll have a little wiener dog and my cat Jack (assuming he's still alive). I will have gone on fun little trips with friends (NYC and Chicago to name a few). OH! And I will have run a marathon! You better believe a 26.2 sticker is on the back of my car! I'm not sure where I'll live, but wherever it is- Colorado or Washington or who knows! I'll make wherever I am home, that is for sure.

TEN YEARS

In ten years, I will be married. I will have finally found the guy that swept me off my feet and made all those years as single lady worth it. I can imagine that most of my friends will have gotten married as well, so I will become an expert wedding guest. My husband and I will live in a cozy little home with white walls and dark floors full of pictures, and a chalkboard wall in my seafoam green kitchen. I imagine myself as a new mom, with one child... for now that is. Either Charlie Marvin or Ella Margaret will have my heart and given me the miracle of motherhood. I will have graduated from medical school, something I have always wanted to do. Dr. Hannah, healer of the hearts of the littles. I have no idea how I will balance motherhood and medicine, but that's something I will feel out as the time comes. For now, I dream of happy days.

TWENTY YEARS

I picture a life of laughter, spontaneity, and volume! I will be close to my 40s and happily married to my man. I picture a house full of footsteps and laughter and yes, some messes. I imagine that my days of having children will be close to over, and I will have six littles- Ella, Piper, Charlie, Charlotte, Mia, and Samson. While my life is loud and not always in my control, I will have grown to live by the motto, "Come what may and love it". I will live in my dream house, which is big enough for our large family but not overwhelmingly massive. I live for those warm Sunday mornings with all the sunlight flooding inside the house, as my husband and I are up early making breakfast and listening to old soul crooners, like Ella Fitzgerald and Frank Sinatra. My kids will know every lyric to ABBA songs and our days will end on the trampoline, as we have a family dance party. And as a mother, that is all I could wish for. Now, my MD days are still continuing, as I work at a fantastic practice where my hours are flexible and I can enjoy being a mom and a doctor. We are lucky enough to go on fun family vacations to Disney World and Hawaii, and are waiting until our youngest is six to go to Europe. It's not perfect- broken bones, broken hearts, and broken vases aren't out of the ordinary, but my life is ever more colorful and joyful then I could have ever pictured!

And now, I must wait. Who knows what will happen? But I know I can't wait for it all. I'll take in each moment for what it is, and savor it. Plus, if this all happened at once, I think I'd have a stomachache from all that sweetness! Here's to time and the future!

And to quote The Sisterhood of Traveling Pants...
                "Time is what keeps things from happening all at once."

xo
Hannah

Shooting in Raw

Today, I was talking to a girl about blogging. We're close friends and she's followed my blog from the start. She asked me, "But don't you worry about putting stuff about your life on the Internet for anyone to see?"

You see the answer to that may change one day, but for now it is a whole hearted no. I know I have blog readers around the world, so many I won't ever meet. I also know I have blog readers from my own school, some friends, some people who found my blog through ways I do not know. Regardless, I don't really care who knows about my life. I recall the day I heard someone from school say they had read my blog. I was more than anything shocked because I've tried for myself, and it is no easy feat to find my blog. While I was very curious as to how they found my blog, I also feared that soon, my life would be like the older Disney Channel movie "Read It and Weep". While my thoughts were processing, one thing stuck out to me-- the people from school who were reading this actually had an interest in my life, they were nosy like about everyone else in the world. So while I could be mad or embarrassed, I instead smile and type away, because I know that someone, whether I like them or not, will read this, just dying to know my life details. Hello to all of you!

Anyways, back to the question. How I see my blog is like a journal of my life, with some pictures, and easy access to look at things in the past. It is my life, unedited. As I have been learning about using my new camera, a common suggestion is learning how to shoot in RAW as soon as possible. Photographers describe RAW as “what is right in front of you, right now”.  That’s what I like to think of my blog as. I take what I see, and how I see it, and put it here. Because really, as amazing as some of those processed, photoshopped pictures can be, there is nothing as genuinely beautiful as the original photo.

So to my all my readers out there, known, unknown, friends, or not, I hope you enjoy life as it is.

My very first picture in RAW// there's just something about the peace snow brings

xo
Hannah

Welcome to the Family!

For a few years now, I have been drooling over DSLRs. I love how perfectly they capture life and how stunning each picture comes out. However, I have not been drooling over the price. Sorry Charlie but I don't have 500 big ones to dish out on a camera. And then the good lord above intervened.

For her birthday, Macko asked for a new camera. Long story short, she got a Nikon D3100 because it was on clearance and a better deal than the original camera she wanted. The lucky girl also got 10% off because she got the display camera. So after hearing about how she practically stole a DSLR (under $300 folks!! You can't get that price anywhere!!) I politely asked permission if I could get the same camera because it's one of those things in life that is far too good to pass up. Because Mack's the best, she let me get the camera:) So now we're twins at even more things in life.

So everyone, I'd like to introduce to you my new baby.

Not too many other pictures have been taken with it yet, but we can still ooo and ahh over these;)

The yummiest popcorn ever... recipe coming soon

My mouth is watering

he's pretty fantastic

Marv wanted a pic with some meat he made

:)

 I now feel like a real life official blogger! And now I try to figure this baby out... 

xo
Hannah

My Best Friend's Birthday

On Thursday, February 27, my best friend turned the big 1-8. It's insane because I remember the day she turned 15 so clearly.

15

16 (she wore the same shirt to tennis on her 18th bday as she did on her 16th bday)

17

Even though I'm sure I've told this story several times on my blog now, it's one worth sharing.

There's this quote that I really like- "We cannot tell the precise moment when friendship is formed. As in filling a vessel drop by drop, there is at last a drop which makes it run over; so in a series of kindnesses there is at last one which makes the heart run over" but I hate to say it's not true for me and Mack. Forever in my memory is the day Macko and I became BFFs. It was the very first day of high school. A few weeks before school started, everyone was getting calls telling them who they're seminar (basically your homeroom for four years) teacher was. The frenzy of Facebook posts then occurred and I distinctly remembering how I hoped Mackenzie would be in my seminar. That sounds really strange now that I've typed it out, but Mackenz and I sorta knew each other from a writing club at the library we took in elementary school and then from volleyball in middle school. So when I saw on Facebook we were in the same class, I screamed and danced around the house. You also share a locker with someone in your seminar and I just had this gut feeling Mack would be the perfect locker buddy;) So on the first day of school, when we were all waiting outside of the school clumped with kids in our seminar, I remember talking to Mackenzie. We were both VERY awkward, but we both asked each other to be locker buddies so boom! It was perfect. Right from the start, Mackenzie and I had an instant connection; we just get each other. There's really no other ay to describe it. So from freshman year on, I've had my best friend by my side. We have been through it all together, and always come out together. We've seen each other at our best and worst and that's what I love so much about our friendship. Our favorite things have always been the same, whether they be TV shows, music, clothes, shoes, or ideas on things to do.This about sums up our friendship:
We drive to Sonic, order slushes, sit there for far too long talking about anything (music, college, bloggers we follow, clothes and shoes we want, etc) then drive home, listening to a wide range of music, and go to a park to take pictures for our blogs. We then might go wander around Target, run, or play tennis, and then get all nostalgic about life.

So yep, that's me and Mack. For her birthday, we went all out.

Because the two of us absolutely love ABBA, I decided it was only appropriate to celebrate on her birthday, and her birthday eve. So on Wednesday night, I kidnapped her to celebrate her last night as a dancing queen. If you are confused, listen to this song

You are the Dancing Queen, young and sweet, only seventeen...

After some spying on her throughout the night via Ainsley, I drove over at about 8:15. I pulled up, called her and asked her to come out (which she was confused about), and I then blasted "Dancing Queen" and made her put on her crown so we could celebrate properly with some drinks. Drinks being lemon berry lime slushes a la Sonic. I definitely think Poodle was surprised. After some great talking, I brought her home. It was actually probably our best conversation night at Sonic and we were both emotional by the end. But hey, that's us! 

What Mackenzie didn't realize that her birthday surprises were just beginning... 

At midnight, I gave Mackenzie a customary birthday call. I then finished homework until about 1:30am... and woke up at 4:30am. It was time for the next surprise! The four of us were planning to go wake up and kidnap Mackenz for birthday breakfast before school, but surprise to us Mackenzie was up when I got there:/ When I pulled up to her house at 5:50am and saw her light on I could not believe she was up! But Ainsley let me in, and luckily Mack was in the bathroom. So I went to hang out in her bedroom to surprise her when she came back in. Then Ainsley remembered she was possibly going to be curling her hair, so I snapchatted her a picture of me in her bed with the caption "Hey, where are you?" The bathroom door then swung open and in came Poodle. Riley came over shortly after, and we ordered her to get dressed and we took her off to Denny's for birthday breakfast. Sierra met us there and we ate and talked for an hour before school.

the perks of getting up early

the birthday queen

I love the sunrise a little more than I love the sunset tbh

Lucky us got out of history early so that's always a birthday bonus. I sadly did not see Mack for the rest of the day until tennis, in which we challenged each other. We always have a lot of fun playing each other because we just make ridiculous sounds and talk the whole time. While we were at tennis, Jessica was decorating Mackenzie's car back at school. Another great surprise for the birthday girl! (I thought I had pictures of this but I guess not) I hope Mackenzie had the best birthday ever because we sure do love her!

Here is 18 of my fave memories with Mackenzie

1. This isn't really a memory but I love all her nicknames. Mackenpoodle (Poodle) takes the cake though

picture by jessica

2. CROSS COUNTRY RUNNING!

3. This little photoshoot freshman year. (insert crying of laughter emoji) Looks like a lesbian engagment shoot

4. Looking oh so cute at Anthro

5. Embarking on teen motherhood

6. Freshman year church retreats 

7. Letting our freak flags fly because wearing Hunters in the rain is something worth having our moms take pictures of us for

8. Half marathon training (more details on that later but it's really happening!)

9. We're the funnest people on the tennis team

10. EUROPE

11. Movie dates 

12. Party planning!

our coordinating outfits make me want to pee my pants laughing 

13. Matching. Always and forever unintentional

14. Late night sledding dates

15. Fashion blogging

16. SONIC

17. The swings pictures series

18.Well, basically all of our memories

since we are hawt

I hope 18 is the best yet Poodle! I love you!

xo

Hannah