"Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy."

About

Showing posts with label CU Freshman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label CU Freshman. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

So Good, So Soon


 I've been itching to write lately. The itch is powered purely by avoidance and my lack of desire to study for finals, but what else is new.

Exactly a year ago, I wrote this post. I was reading it this evening and couldn't believe the parallel. I am torn in two now, like I was last year. I am so going to miss living in Smith South Third with so many of my close friends so incredibly close by, but I am also so excited to be home for the summer. I felt like last year was a close to my childhood days, and I now feel like the end of this year is another close. It's like last year was the end of first edition of Hannah's Life, and at the start of this year, the second edition began, but this year is the end of the first chapter. The thing is, this first chapter has done a fair job shaping me for the next chapters in this edition. Granted, nothing is set in stone, but without second edition chapter one Hannah, there wouldn't be a chapter two. Life is just this big long domino effect, ultimately ending with happiness. 

Currently, I've really been into this song. It completely moved me to tears the first time I heard it.


It's grounding me through this stress. Unlike last year, I have not been putting the stress aside. It has completely consumed me, but it's also what's pushing me through.  Finals are five days away and I am up to my neck, finishing up the semester's workload and studying. The sounds are just glorious, the meaning is beautiful, and I love that it's based on the theme of "Gabriel's Oboe" because that makes me think of Christmas time.

Right now, it's about surviving. Remembering to breathe. To still say yes. And to sleep.

Over and out blog world. Next time I come around, I will have finished my first year of college!

xo
Hannah

Saturday, April 25, 2015

The Final Week

There's no perfect way to start this post. I've been looking at a blank page with a blinking cursor trying to artfully craft an eloquent opening line but all that I can come up with is

WOW.

I have eight days left of my first year of college. Just typing that gives me all sorts of emotions... happiness, sadness, excitement, relief, disbelief, just all the feelings. The year went by quickly, but it also dragged by. I went through some of the lowest of lows and the highest of highs. I've laughed, cried, danced, and learned more about myself in these past 8 months than I have learned in 19 years.

Once I am home and completely finished, I'm going to write a big old reflection post because this year sure as heck deserves one. Right now, I'm just in a state of shock that this year is almost over. I'm sad to be further away from my friends (having them live down the hall is so amazing), but I am SO ready to be home! To be with my family! My pets! To not live out of a suitcase! To start my nannying job! For the sweet freedom of summer! For Hawaii!

As I embark on this last week, I want to soak it all in. I'm someone who thinks an awful lot about firsts and lasts. I think about how Thursday will be my last bio lab, and how Tuesday will be my last breakfast at Libby, and how I only have a few more days of swiping into South Third. 

I remember how I was feeling eight months ago. I was a little sad, a little excited, a little nervous, not really knowing what to expect. In a sense, I was numb, simply adapting. And now, I'm feeling numb again. Time is fleeting, that I know is true. The days are long, the years are short. It's all just weird. I feel the same, but sooooo different. I can sit here and try to analyze myself a little longer, but it makes me all sorts of crazy. So instead I'll catch you up on life.

SHE MADE VARSITY!!! So proud of my little Pom!
Always loling at Bella
SUCH a treat to see Amanda and catch up! I miss her so much!
Free cone day at Ben and Jerry's!
The wild Christine in her natural habitat, searching for paper owls in biology lab
Creepiest pic of me ever lol. Prep for our ABBA Dancing Queen party!
I did one last little load of laundry on Friday and couldn't help but notice how colorful I am (sarcasm)
Emma has her car currently, which means Sonic and Chick Fil A (praise the Lord)

Yoga on Farrand Field, like all the Boulderites
So pro 
Love these two so so much
Movie night watching Gone Girl, the craziest movie ever (I didn't get the open mouth memo)
I'm really going to miss the pond. Especially in the rain.
My absolute favorite little loves came to visit me in Boulder today! Absolutely made my week!


So it's time to buckle down, study lots, pack up this tiny room, and kiss freshman year goodbye! Happiness ahead!

xo
Hannah

Monday, April 13, 2015

To My Sister(s)


I was talking on the phone with my mom tonight, catching up on the past 24 hours, and just chatting about whatever, like we always do. She told me she was trying to find a good, recent picture of Olivia for her poms tryout this week. I instantly thought of a photo shoot from the fall where at least few good pics were taken. I had Mack send them to me, but I looked through other pictures from that afternoon and smiled. I watched the video we made that day and completely began to tear up.




In late September, I was listening to Katie Herzig's latest album, excitedly awaiting her concert in October. "Thick as Thieves" came on as I was writing a paper and I was instantly taken back by how much I loved it, and then came the vision. I knew the phrase thick as thieves was often used to describe best friends or siblings. I immediately thought of my "sisters". Mackenzie, Olivia, Ainsley, Isabel, and I have this bond, one of sisters. Ours ages are staggered, so we are all in different seasons of life. As one of the older 'sisters' in the group, I get to share my wisdom (though it usually ignored) and relive the days of youth. We laugh, fight, and love each other. Mackenzie and I knew we just had to make a video to this song. It just evoked some emotion in me that I really can't even try to explain. So the day came and Mack and I were so pumped and ready. In true sister form, there was lots of criticism from the others. We took so so much video, and it's for the better you can't hear us. So much mocking. This is a more accurate video of the day;) But in the end, the big sisters got their way;)

Nonetheless, I love how the video turned out, no matter how cheesy. I love that the magic of sisterhood is captured. As I watched it, I was texting Mackenz, proclaiming my love for those younger three who we are so different from, yet love so much.

The first semester of college was not easy. It was great, don't get me wrong, but I was still trying to adapt and figure out this new life that was supposedly going to be the "best ever". I ached for the comfort of high school and home and the familiar. I loved the group text I had with O, Isabel, Ains, and Mack, and the times we had together when I was home. Looking back on it now, I am grateful for that difficult transitional period because it made me really appreciate those 'sisters' of mine. Mack pointed out that most of our friends have brothers, and from that, an appreciation for sisters has been born. (I do love my brother #blessed to have both).

Now as much as love Mack, Ains, and Isabel, I'm going to focus this post in on my own flesh and blood sister, Olivia.


So so rough


That's about right


Liv and I share a lot more differences than we do similarities, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I will never forget the day she was born, as I sat in the waiting room with my mom's friends, anxious to find out if I would be having a baby sister or baby brother. I so desperately wanted a little sister so we could wear matching outfits and play with dolls together and all that fun sister stuff. My mom's friend went off to get me some cranberry juice, but instead came back with my grandma, who had a smile spread across her face. She took my hand, as I went off to meet this new sibling of mine. When I found out it was a girl, my own little sister!, it was like all my dreams had come true.

Time went on and I realized she was not this perfect little doll/slave who would always comply with me. As we grew up, she began to copy me, steal from me, and push my buttons. But she was my baby sister. It's been incredible to watch her grow up and become herself, this fierce little creature who is my opposite, yet my pride (wow that sounds so weird). I love to see her work so hard and be so passionate, just like myself. Our arenas look different, as mine is usually in a chair with a textbook and a notebook, and hers is on the stage in front of hundreds of people.



What I lack in athletic talent, Olivia makes up for, plus more. The girl can dance. Like real dance. The kind that takes technique and grace and art, not just flailing your body all over the place and jumping to the rhythm (aka Hannah dancing). When she is on a stage, she shines. The girl works her tail end off, as she takes hours of dance classes a week, while still managing to get phenomenal grades, and very little sleep;) She sets her eye on the prize and will not quit until she gets it. I so wish I had her talent, and am always in awe by it.


Most of the time, I know she thinks I am the most annoying, mean, weird older sister. I am not cool and I embarrass her *almost* as much as mom does. But oh man, do I love her. I would go to the ends of the earth for her. and I am so insanely proud of her.

So Olive, it's the beginning of the big week, but girlfriend, you've got this. You have done this before and you are more than ready to do it again. You have the skills, you have the technique, you have the experience, you have the talent, but most of all you, you have the passion and charisma. You are unforgettable and dance with your heart, which makes you the best dancer possible. I am so proud of everything you do, and cannot wait to watch you dance more. I'll always be there screaming my brains out for you, and to take you to Sonic afterwards. Leave it all on the floor, sista. Love love love you.

xoxo
Hannah

Sunday, April 12, 2015

The End in Mind

Boy has it been a while since I've been here, with a blinking cursor on a blank new post page. My mind is sort of all over the place right now. I've really been missing writing and sharing and reflecting.  Life has been something wonderful lately. Busy, but beautiful. I have 22 days left until I am finished with my first year of college. C R A Z Y. I'm ready for summer but I'm not sure I'm ready for this all to be over. It's been a roller coaster of a year but the best ride ever.

A year ago was the end of an era, prom, my final high school dance. I looked forward to high school dances *almost* as much as Christmas. I lived for the thrill of getting dressed up and eating a fancy dinner and taking pictures and DANCING (duh) and going to Village Inn afterwards and spending all night talking. So many of my favorite high school memories root from high school dances. They were where we could let loose and just celebrate life for no particular reason.

Last night, while I was not wearing a full length gown or sporting a fancy updo, the dancing and celebrating continued. My best friends and I got together for another Smith South Third Girls Night, dancing and singing all of ABBA's greatest hits from Mamma Mia. We opened all the windows, turned off the lights and put on the disco ball, and danced on the tables. We painted nails and chatted about the smallest of things and the biggest of things. It was a good night.

 I feel like lately whenever I do blog, it's all "wow time is flying, yay I love college, ahh remember everything that was just going on a year ago, happy happy happy". It's weird. I feel like there's nothing big to blog about because life is so normal and ordinary, but also so extraordinary. It's a difficult emotion to try to describe. Life is simple, filled with class, studying, homework, and friends. But it's so dang awesome. It's like I'm the same but so different. I'm growing up and figuring out who the heck I am (aren't we all?) but I am also so sure of who I am and what I want. I guess the problem is I know what I want but this little thing called time is standing in the way. While I have grown to be more patient and am better about living in the now, I do need to work on my anxiousness. I'm in a rut and I just want to break the chains and run and explore and adventure. I want to be thoughtful and observant and there for others.

I really think I just need to get out of my dorm room;)

This week is all about taking it day by day. I will do what I can, when I can, and be happy. Three more weeks of classes, and one day of finals. Standing calmly at the crossroads, no desire to run.

xo
Hannah

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Taking Stock// March

In honor of my birth month
Making: a tentative schedule for next semester
Drinking: Naked Orange Mango juice- tastes like Hawaii!
Reading: "Paper Towns" by John Green
Wanting: PB Half Baked by Ben and Jerry's. Please come to a Boulder store!!

Looking: at the beautiful blossoming trees around campus!
Feeling: SO happy that I got a 97% on my disabilites midterm!
Playing: Florence + the Machine. I'm really into her music right now for whatever reason

Missing: my family. I had so much fun with them over break!
Wishing: for this warm weather to last the rest of the year!
Enjoying: the warm weather! 78 degrees, don't mind if I do!
Waiting: to meet Christine to finish our bio presentation

Laughing: at the "Lil' Sebastian" episode of Parks and Rec. TOO FUNNY!
Liking: the tranquility of Kitt Pond in the evening
Hoping: to make the most of the semester!
Marvelling: that I have 34 days left in the semester!

Needing: to put a fresh coat of nail polish on
Smelling: my new Anthro "Oceane" perfume
Wearing: shorts!! WOO HOO!
Watching: 
Parks and Rec
Noticing: how much has changed in the past year. For the better, I have to believe.

Bookmarking: this blog. It's a joint blog I write at with my best friends! Check it out :)
Opening: a Butterfinger egg- yum yum yum!

xo
Hannah

Monday, March 23, 2015

N I N E T E E N

This past week has been full of surprises by my most wonderful best friends, near and far. I have never felt so loved!

It started with the customary Beau Jo's night. We ate delicious pizza and hung out in my room, as we planned our weddings via Pinterest. It was so much fun! I love love love girl time like that. We made cupcakes the next night at midnight, as per tradition. I feel so lucky to have my best friends living all on the same floor as me. These past few months would not have been the same without them!
Yay for awkward family photos on little beds!

On Tuesday, Riley and Jessica came up to Boulder and surprised me big time! I sadly have no pictures from that evening but I was very shocked to see them!

I came home on Friday for spring break to a house decorated with streamers and balloons and banners, all thanks to my awesome siblings. I went up to my room to drop my bags to see my cute little dog sitting on my bed, surrounded by more balloons and streamers, when suddenly, Riley, Mack, Isabel, and Olivia all popped out and surprised me! We spent the evening jumping on my trampoline, eating crab legs, taking pictures, drinking Sonic, and eating lemon cake. It was such a fantastic way to start of spring break, and my birthday weekend!
So cute, so Riley
Gossip Girl/ melt into each other

Love them all so much!


Fun fact: I smashed my own cake because I put my duffel bag on top of it
Crabby ladies

Saturday, my mom, aunt, sister, and I got our nails done, did some shopping, and had my cousins over for dinner. It was a day like so many weekends when I was in high school and I so cherished the familiarity. Mack took me to birthday eve Sonic and we enjoyed being back in our domain.

Sunday was my actual birthday. I woke up to red tulips (a favorite) sitting on my dresser, and a dad ready to take me out to breakfast. We had some really good eggs and hazelnut coffee, talked about our upcoming vacation to Hawaii, and came home to my friends. Riley gave me a quick birthday hug before heading to pick her friend up from the airport and going back to school. Then Mack came by and showed me this video.



Oh. my. goodness. I couldn't stop smiling. It is the best gift that I have ever received and will hold it close to my heart forever. I have watched it a million times already and never get tired of it. My blessings are utterly abundant.

My sister had a dance competition downtown in the afternoon, so I invited Mack to come with and go out to dinner with us. We forced asked Brandon to take some pictures because the lighting was just dreamy and the architecture is so lovely downtown. It was such a great day!








Personal favorite


love these (not so) little siblings of mine!
The best family pic we could get
She is the best of the best!
I just know 19 is going the be incredible. Thank you to everyone who made 18 so great! I can't wait to see what the future brings!

xo
Hannah

Saturday, March 21, 2015

18 Things I Learned at 18

Today, I am savoring my last day of 18, my best year yet. 2014 as a whole was great, but my 18th year was just wow. When I really think back to a year ago today, and then situate myself back into reality, I get goosebumps. It has been quite the whirlwind, and everything has changed. I think this is the first year where I do feel older, and a little bit different. I am more sure of who I am and what a wonderful feeling that is.

18 has been the most telling year yet. I learned a lot about myself, life, and the value that comes with it. Here's 18 things that have really became apparent to me this past year.

1. Accept and embrace change, arms wide open.
18 was the year of change. I left home and was a new, independent adult. There's no doubt that change is hard, however, being open to new experiences and opportunities will make the transition SO much easier.

2. The homework will always get finished, so go be with your friends. You don't have forever to always be with each other.
I especially learned this in the past few months. As an honors student, I spent way too much time focused on my school work. While that is most certainly still a priority, time is something you don't get back. Make the most it always. So go talk with your friends and laugh until the early hours of the morning. You will get the homework done eventually, I promise.

3. Take care of yourself. Your health is in your hands.
Eat healthy, run, be active. Begin practicing healthy habits NOW.

4. Be there for your friends. Friendship is a two-way street.
Always have your door open, tissues ready, and food at hand. Listen, listen, listen! Being a friend is the absolute best gift you could ever give.

5. Time management is vital.
Yes, hang out with your friends and family. But also don't wait to start a paper hours before it is due. Time management is the key to a life with less stress.

6. Don't be so damn hard on yourself!
You are your biggest critic. Just be proud of yourself. Try hard, make mistakes, live with grace.

7. Call your parents at least three times a week.
Thank them for all they have done for you.

8. It's okay to say no.
You don't have to please everyone, especially if that means compromising your own happiness.

9. You need people, and you also need to be alone.
Have your support system, but also learn to be happy alone. I personally thrive on alone time and need some space every now and then to rejuvenate. 

10. It is very important to treat yoself.
Personally, I enjoy Starbucks. Because I am quite basic.

11. Take pictures- you will cherish them forever.
Pictures are snapshots of moments, but the memories behind them mean so much more. That's what you will remember. The little details, the crazy stories, how you felt.

12. If you don't like something, do something about it.
You are in charge of your life. Stop complaining and do what you can to make the situation better.

13. Time flies, heals, and somehow works everything out.
Just let it happen.

14. DANCE IT OUT!
Move your body in crazy ways and reality sorta disappears. It's awesome.

15. Even when it doesn't seem like it, everything happens for a reason.
So cliche, I know. But hey, it's true, there's no arguing it. Sometimes, you know the reason immediately. Sometimes, you won't know for years. 

16. Instead of dreaming of the person you want to be, just be you.
This isn't always easy. Be the person you are, but also be the person you want to be. They will always mesh together once you get that perfect harmony.

17. Be vulnerable.
My life motto. Cry. Share your fears. Be honest. 

18. Cultivate kindness, find joy, love life.
Happy happy happy!

Thanks to every person who has made this past year the best! I will hold onto each moment, but also look with excitement to the future. Thank you 18, I love you.

xo
Hannah

Friday, March 13, 2015

High Five for Friday!

This week has been nothing but happy. There was nothing in particular that made it so darn joyful, it just was. I had two midterms Monday and a lab quiz on Thursday which aren't always fun, but the weather has been something wonderful and warm and the sunshine has brought me so much happy! The forecast for the weekend is great (75 on Sunday!!!) and spring break is a week away. I woke up to the smell of rain and had a major dance party while getting ready. Spring is in the air! "Pumped Up Kicks" by Foster the People always gets my day started right, along with a big cup of coffee. Classes went quickly, and Christine and I got Starbucks to kick off the weekend. I deep cleaned my room and am catching up on Grey's, and plan on hanging out with Em, Mack, and Mel tonight. I am on a roller coaster that only goes up!

I didn't do a great job of documenting the week, but my dad went to San Diego this week for business and made sure to send my family a million pictures that only made us very jealous. I don't think I could ever live in California, but the warm weather and beaches sure do make it tempting. Even though the weather here has been pretty amazing, I think my whole family was wishing to be in San Diego mostly just to escape reality. We had a wonderful trip there this summer and loved every second of it. So here's a glimpse into my dad's life this week.

1. View of the city from Coronado Island

 2. The Marina

 3. Coronado Beach- oh what I would give to be there now!

4. He went on a behind-the-scenes tour of the San Diego Zoo. What a rough life!

5. A beautiful, beautiful sunset

I suppose I am fine here nestled up to the beautiful Flatirons, I really don't have much to complain about;) But I am very much looking forward to the beach and warmth and humidity... only 103 days until Hawaii! not that I'm counting of course;)

Happy weekend, loves!

xo
Hannah